Logan was the first to try it this morning.
“Daddy,” he whined in his most pathetic voice. “I don’t feel good. My throat hurts.”
“Aww,” sympathized Ed. “I bet you think you need to stay home from school too, don’t you?”
“Yes,” he said in that soft, raspy voice. He clutched his neck for effect.
“Tough. You’re going to school,” said his Daddy with an evil grin.
“I guess you just don’t care about your kids then, huh?” demanded Logan. If he wasn’t going to get his way, he might as well throw a barb or two.
“Nope,” laughed Ed. “I sure don’t.”
He walked out in a huff after his Daddy clearly bested him.
Ed continued getting ready for work and just a few minutes later, Trip walked in. Trip took at moment to prepare his argument and make sure the proper, pathetic expression was on his face.
“Daddy,” he whined piteously. “My stomach hurts.”
Clearly, he had not spoken with his brother about their morning tactics. I should suggest a strategy meeting in the mornings before they try to pull the wool over their Daddy’s eyes.
“What’s the matter with it?”
“I don’t know. It just hurts really bad.”
“That’s rough, boy. I bet you need to stay home from school, don’t you?”
Trip’s eyes lit up, but he was able to catch himself before saying anything, weary of the trap his Daddy might be laying. “Yes, I need to stay home from school.”
“Well, you know that means you’ll have to come up to the office with me and you’ll have to sleep on the couch all day, right?”
“Yeah, if you’re too sick for school, then you’re too sick to watch television or play on your ipad or anything else. You’ll have to lay on the couch and sleep. If you can’t sleep, you’ll have to lay there and just stare at the ceiling.”
Trip started backing away slowly. “I think I feel okay now. I’m okay to go to school.”
“Are you sure, boy? I wouldn’t want you to go to school sick.”
“No, I feel okay. I’m going to school today.”
“Okay, well, go put on your shoes.”
That man I married is smart!